Shes jokes

Your mum went to the dentist so she could install Bluetooth.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch some chips and sweets.

No, he can't keep his heart rate down, and she's got diabetes.

I did this to my ex. I stole her wheelchair. I knew she would come crawling back.

What did the lettuce say when she is popping the champagne?

She’s got 20 dudes in her DMs telling her she is pretty. Stand out, call her ugly.

So, one day I have a wife, but if it's getting a longer day, she is moving so weird, and I see she has sex with Rick Astley. 😂 [rickrolled]

Your mum is so fat, when she slept on the bed, the bed cracked and they had to replace it by a dinosaur.

So a lady came up to me today at the bank, and she asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Your momma is so fat, she was in a movie and the screen broke!

Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage.

Your mama's so fat, when she asked for a water bed, they put a blanket over the Pacific Ocean.

Why did my [redacted] a girl because she said, "Uh."

Your momma so fat she can feed [the] entire continent of Africa with her fat!

I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."

I thought opening a door for a lady was good manners, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies.

She is not “fun to be around.”

"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race

Yo mama so fat, she had to get baptized in the ocean.

Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?

Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!

Yo mama so fat, she has to bathe in the Pacific Ocean.