Shes jokes
My Asian girlfriend has a weird name. As I gave her anal, she was yelling "I'm too young."
Yo momma is so stupid, she saw an anime and started eating a live rabbit, and thought she would get powers!
A woman is lying in bed after making love to her lover. After a moment, she starts to roll over, and in the process, she realizes that the spent condom is still inside her.
Worried, she wakes up her lover. She asks, “What should we do about this?” To which he replies: “Who was it?”
Your mama so fat, she caused a traffic jam just by crossing the street.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball?
Gock gock gock ghghghkghlhglhglhk.
I bought my sister a trampoline. She sat in her wheelchair and cried.
Your mama is so fat, she needs two phones to take a picture of herself.
I broke up with my girlfriend because she wouldn't stand for the pledge. She was in a wheelchair.
Yo mama is so fat that when she walks, she causes earthquakes. She is so big that she has her own zip code and gravity field. She is so heavy that she needs a crane to get out of bed. She is so obese that she can't fit in any clothes, except for a circus tent. She is so large that she blocks the sun and causes eclipses.
- Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow dress, people yell "Taxi!"
- Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
- Yo mama is so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.
- Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.
- Yo mama is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.
Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.
Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.
Yo Mama so thin, when she signed up to be a stripper she became the pole
Yo mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wants to take a bath, they need to make more H2O.
My mum is a vegan. She brings us to after school seitan.
My nan must really love the quiet game, she's been playing it for ages.
Yo mama so nasty, she gave yo daddy head, then gave you a kiss good night.
Why couldn't the blonde dial 911?
She couldn't find the 11.
Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale the doctor asked for her weight, not her phone number.
A woman is on the edge of a bridge, about to commit suicide, when a strange man comes up to her.
"Tell me, why do you wish to end your life?" he asks in a booming but gentle voice.
"My children died last year in a car crash, I'm battling depression, my husband left me, and I lost my job," she sobs. "I don't wish to live anymore."
The man mulls this over, and proclaims, "I will solve all your problems, as I am a wizard and possess unfathomable abilities. However, you must grant me a blowjob first."
The delighted woman readily agrees, takes him below the bridge, and fulfills his request. After they're done, he asks, "How old are you?"
"37," she replies, wiping her mouth.
"You're 37 and you still believe in wizards?"