yo mama so fat when she went on the weighing scale it aid to be continued.
Yo mama so ugly, she got a lifetime ban from KFC for ordering too many burgers.
I had sex with my German girlfriend; it was kinda weird though. She kept yelling her age. I don't know why.
You can tell if a woman is angry if she is holding a gun.
A man was raping a woman and thought the year was 1970, and he exclaimed to the judge later that he was her husband.
She got sent to the Asylum for Hysteria.
Wait, what? Was he actually her husband?
He was a Christian, so that actually meant he was AFTER the rape.
Wait, what? The Bible doesn't say that.
Actually yes, it does, and marital rape was legal until 1990.
WAIT WHAT? That's not funny.
I'll tell ya what's funny, that you think the women have nothing to complain about.
I miss the good old days when you could have a light joke at someone else's expense. Like doing that marital rape thing, it never used to be called that. It used to be called "serving your husband" or "wifely duties". The real joke is that it was legal until 1990.
Why is that a joke?
Because it is piss funny seeing the look on her face when she wakes up in the middle of coitus.
Why is that a joke?
Dude, come on, you want to start your day off happy or not?
Why is that a joke?
She literally looks like she just seen a ghost and sort of flops about trying to fend you off like a rag doll. It's piss funny.
No seriously, dude, why is that a joke? It sounds more like a felony.
"My wife is so crazy," said Beatem's McSmasher.
"Why?" asked his buddy Don Caretomarch.
"She's sitting on the front verandah packing my shit in boxes!"
"You getting kicked out, bro?"
"Yeah, all I did was break every plate in the house over her head. Some people have no sense of humor."
"Is she one of them woke bitches?"
I saw a girl with blond hair. She was sexy and beautiful. I thought she was the most hottest girl I ever saw, so I ran up to her feeling hot.
My girlfriend asked me to hand her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.
Husband: My wife and I went to the beach today.
Husband: She was wearing a blue wetsuit.
Husband: The second we entered the beach,
Pedestrians: "TSUNAMI! TSUNAMI!"
I saw a girl crying. I asked her where her parents were, and she started to cry even more.
Man, I love working in the orphanage.
Q. Why didn't Tracy Latimer enjoy her trip to Vancouver?
A. She had to go to GasTown.
Yo mama so fat, she has to use pillowcases for socks.
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought Instagram was a weed delivery service.
Yo mama so ugly when she went to the ugly club but they said sorry professionals only
Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.
Why do people hate Velma now?
Because she joined the Dark Side.
Bro, Asian girls have the weirdest names. I was, like, with one, and she kept on saying, "I'm too young."
Yo mama so fat, she was mistaken for Eric Cartman from South Park.
