I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"
She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"
I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"
Yo mama so fat, when she made a joke, only one person laughed at it: the pavement. It was absolutely cracking up!
I had asked my dog what 2 - 2 is... . . . . . . . . She said nothing....
My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.