See jokes
Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.
Sister: No, I won't stop.
Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.
Sister: What? You will see when I post it.
Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?
Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.
Regular depressed person: I'm depressed, so I'll go see a therapist.
Me: I'm depressed, so I won't do anything about it, work on many projects at the same time, destroying my sanity slowly while relying on caffeine and pills as my only way to take down my headaches, and making memes about it online to help myself cope with the pain.
What do atoms and parents have in common to orphans? You can't see either of them.
So you see all these Baby Yoda memes when you go online, But you have never really seen the show with him.
He is just SOOOO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A man comes home and finds his wife in bed with another guy. "What's going on here!?" he exclaims.
The wife replies, "See, I told you he was stupid."
I see 6 letters in "the past."
I have 2020 vision.
I see 7 letters in "the future," I have 2021 vision.
My mom told me to get a job, so I did.
One day my mom saw me, I had money. My mom asked me where did you get that money? My mom asked me where did you get that money. I said I got a job in the neighborhood. My mom asked me what do you do, so I said when you take showers I secretly open the door, and I let the guys come and see you one by one, and I get paid for it.
My mom said you're growing up so fast, & I said back to my mom that is what the guys say when they see you in the shower.
You're walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18. You call the manager to have them removed, but no one came down.
Later that night, you see the 2 18-year-olds, 1 was a girl and the other was a boy, so you call the manager down. No one came again. You confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. You are knocked out on the floor. When you wake up, there is a hard feeling in your a**. You turn your head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap-on in your a** going full on hard.
When I finished high school, I wanted to take my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle, but my mom said no.
See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was eighteen, and I could just have his motorcycle.
I can't see the bee.
It's by the beehive.
If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?
They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.
What do lesbian vampires say after sex?
"See you next month."
When you see your friend, you call the police, but they just moan.
Q: Why do I always see gays in the roundabout?
A: They couldn’t go straight.
"Shout out to entity...welcome to hell!"
"Every time I see your icon I vomit lol."
"Get a life... hey I'm violet olivegarden how can I help you if you need me to disc someone ill help..."
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
What do a blind person and an orphan have in common?
They both cannot see their family.
What do orphans in Batman have in common? They'll never see their parents again.
There were people having sex when it started sinking. Legend tells when you go near the ship you can see semen, and if you listen close enough you'll hear them moaning.
Now that's a hell of a ghost story!