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A Japanese man goes to the dentist. After being there for a while, the dentist asks, "How often do you floss your teeth?"
The Jap said, "After every meal." When they finish up, the dentist turns to him and says, "You need to floss your eyes more. I can still see them."
What is worse than seeing your sibling drown?
Getting the water bill.
You will never see a redneck opposing a war.
He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"
How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to light up the room with space lasers so the other can see, and one to screw it in.
Yo mama so fat you can see her from 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 galaxies away!
POV: You are a passenger on September 11th, 2001, and you see the pilots wearing a Muslim turban.
The last words from a depressive person are: "I finally see a train!"
What did the skeleton say when the other skeleton lied to him?
"You can't lie to me! I can see right through you!"
When your mom comes in at night then sees your... sleeping, but sees something moving, so she gets a chair and whacks it, then she says, "I thought it was a mouse."
I could never date a midget.
We would never see eye to eye.
Tell someone to spell "Icup."
Answer: It will say, "I see you pee!"
My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"
When you see someone with a double chin that’s sad:
Hey come on, man, keep your chin up. Wait, which one?
A retarded kid sees a murderer chopping up his latest victim with a saw. The retarded kid yells, "Seesaw!" because he sees a saw.
Why can't we see or sense kamikazes' bombs?
They're out of plane sight.
Q: What did the fetus say to the tongs?
A: See you on the flip side.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
IDK! WHY?
To go see yo mama!
Whenever you see an orphan taking a selfie, photo bomb him and say, "Family photo!"
My bf: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
My bf: Ice cream.
Me: Ice cream who?
My bf: I scream if you don't let me see that smoking hot body!
When you want to see and smell your ex for the last time, look at a ugly dog, and smell the garbage.