Sea jokes
Yo mama so fat, her swimming is Sea World.
Why are dolphins so smart?
Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!
What do you call an orphan fish?
Self-ish.
What do you call male mermaids?
Mer-butlers!
Q: If Adolf Hitler was a sea creature, which would he be?
A: Adlof-in.
What kind of fish comes out at night?
A starfish.
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
What did the fish get on his math test?
A sea plus.
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
Why didn't the boy want to read "2000 Leagues Under the Sea"?
It was too much pressure.
Why did the fish cross the sea?
To get to the other tide! 😂 😂 😂
Octopussy.
Me: That’s a good WAVE.
Friend: I SEA it.
Wave: Doesn't break for us to surf on.
Me: I was SHORE it would be good.
Friend: I SEA what you did there.
What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?
Others: R.
Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.
A is for Amy who fell down the stairs.
B is for Basil assaulted by bears.
C is for Clara who wasted away.
D is for Desmond thrown out of a sleigh.
E is for Ernest who choked on a peach.
F is for Fanny sucked dry by a leech.
G is for George smothered under a rug.
H is for Hector done in by a thug.
I is for Ida who drowned in a lake.
J is for James who took lye by mistake.
K is for Kate who was struck with an axe.
L is for Leo who swallowed some tacks.
M is for Maud who was swept out to sea.
N is for Neville who died of ennui.
O is for Olive run through with an awl.
P is for Prue trampled flat in a brawl.
Q is for Quentin who sank in a mire.
R is for Rhoda consumed by a fire.
S is for Susan who perished of fits.
T is for Titus who flew into bits.
U is for Una who slipped down a drain.
V is for Victor squashed under a train.
W is for Winnie embedded in ice.
X is for Xerxes devoured by mice.
Y is for Yorick whose head was knocked in.
Z is for Zillah who drank too much gin.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing. It just "waved!"
What did the one ocean say to the other? Nothing, it just waved.
I wanted to visit my pet fish, but it was hard to sea it through the darkness.
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
(This isn't really a joke btw anyway.) SpongeBob, me boy, ye ruptured me intestines with that massive c*ck of yours, agahgahagahagahagah!