Scientists say I'm made up of 75% of water.
But after jumping in the ocean, it's 100%, just like my depression.
Scientist Jokes
What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?
Stephen Hawking.
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
Have you ever walked in to Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
The reason Steven Hawking died is he lost his internet connection.
Have you ever stepped foot in Stephen Hawking's house? 'Cause he hasn't either.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Heads and Shoulders?
I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.
Where was Stephen Hawking buried?
In a black hole. 😂🤣
Steven Hawking lost the Wi-Fi connection on March 14, 2018.
Why did the scientist want to take off his doorbell?
Because he wanted to win the no-bell prize.
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.
What did scientists prove when they saw a skeleton on the moon?
The cow didn’t make it.
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.
Stephen Hawking is such a bad role model for our kids.
He only ever looks one way when crossing the street.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
Steven Hawking walks into a bar... no, I'm just kidding.
