School jokes
Today in 3rd grade English, the teacher asked the kids a question, "What turns on when you take your clothes off?"
Little Elsa blushed and screamed, "You can't ask that!"
The English teacher repeats the question and Elsa screams, "I'll tell my parents on you and get you fired!"
Finally, Little Tim raises his hand, "The shower, ma'am."
The English teacher clapped her hands, "Good job, Tim, and as for you Elsa, you do not have the body for that."
A teacher in Scunthorpe asks a class what their favorite football team is, saying, "Raise your hand if it is Scunthorpe." Every student but one raised their hand. The teacher asks, "Why don't you support Scunthorpe?" The child answers, "My parents support Grimsby, and so do I." The teacher comes back with, "Why are you copying your parents? What if your mum was a prostitute and your dad a druggie?" The child answers, "Then I'd support Scunthorpe like you dirty bastards!"
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?
A Sandy Hooker
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
POV there’s a school shooting.
American: First time, European?
European: Yeah, you American?
American: No, not my first time.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a Covid test and got an F.
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?
Why do orphans hate school?
No field trips. Parent signature_____________.
School was fun, but it was hard, almost like riding a bike that’s on fire and the grounds on fire and everything’s on fire because it’s hell.
Why can't an orphan go to a field trip?
Parent's signature: ___________
What is an orphan's favorite period? Homeroom.
"I met a girl and she's 28."
"Now I'm the coolest guy in all of 8th grade."
- AJR
I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.
Today, I had an exam in school. When I was done, I raised my hand and yelled, “Pisstiano Penaldo!”
My teacher smiled and took my paper. She knew I was finished.
Teacher: "I'll call your mother."
Orphan: "Go on, see if she picks up."
What is black when it’s clean and white when it’s dirty?
Answer: A chalkboard.
Teacher: "You know you can't sleep in my class."
Boy: "I know. Maybe if you were a little quieter, I could."
I tore up my homework, but then I replaced it with this copy. It may look like it, but trust me, it's different! The answers ARE RIGHT, better than left!
I was in math class, and we were learning geometry. My teacher said, "PENTAGON!" then all of a sudden, PENALDO burst into the room! He thought we were talking about PENS, so he came looking for some because he's a finished pen merchant! Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my education! 🤬