School jokes

Some girl just walks into my 6th period geography class. The first thing I think is, "Oh shit! It's mini Regina George without titties!"

So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.

A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀

The school shooter: "I finally found you worthless crybabies!!"

The Quiet Kid: "How are a bag of chips and a mac11 the same?"

The school shooter: "I don't know."

The Quiet kid: "When you pull them out everybody wants to be your friend."

How do you get to the Hogwarts gym?

Go through the dumbbell door.

I drove by the gun shop the other day and everything was half off for back to school.

I had a dog with an eating disorder.

He wouldn’t eat any of my homework.

Little girls are like basic math. If they're under 13, you do them in your head.

Teacher: "If you don't understand, ask your parents at home."

Orphan: "I don't have neither of those :c"

What’s one good thing about pedophiles?

They drive slow in school zones.

When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering, but you walk toward his gun; "I will finish what you started."

School reminds me of a penis. It's long and hard unless you're Asian.

Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."

Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?

A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.

Today in 3rd grade English, the teacher asked the kids a question, "What turns on when you take your clothes off?"

Little Elsa blushed and screamed, "You can't ask that!"

The English teacher repeats the question and Elsa screams, "I'll tell my parents on you and get you fired!"

Finally, Little Tim raises his hand, "The shower, ma'am."

The English teacher clapped her hands, "Good job, Tim, and as for you Elsa, you do not have the body for that."

Where is the cheapest gun range? Your local public school.

What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?

A Sandy Hooker

What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?

A high school pill party.

POV there’s a school shooting.

American: First time, European?

European: Yeah, you American?

American: No, not my first time.

I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.

Teacher: "I'll call your mother."

Orphan: "Go on, see if she picks up."