Say jokes
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
Some people could say that the sky was falling that day,
one second they saw the sun and the next they saw heaven.
They say the polar ice caps are melting, good, because my wife's a fat, cold bitch.
What did the hairline say to the hat?
"We go way back..."
If your wife says: “What would you most like to do to my body?” “Identify it” is the wrong answer.
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Dam.
What did the retard say when the water too deep?
"Deep deep."
I'm about to say this but.....
*whentheimposterissus*
Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on a scale, it says "to be continued."
Why does an orphan cry when we say "ur mom?"
Because they have no mom.
What did Amtrak say at the Olympics?
I AM keeping Trak!
Me sais yes to mom when she seis wha is 1 plus 1 and me is says NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! looooooooooooooooooolllolololololol
You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.
Yesterday, I saw an advert with a random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful.
And then I said, "Except the fat people." And then I got sent to my room for saying that.
Waiter says, "Sir, we ran out of ranch, so I had the boys in the back improvise. But don't worry... It has even more zip & twang to it!"
What did the parrot say when it saw a duck?
"Polly want a quacker!"
Worst joke ever.
What do you say to your partner with diabetes?
Hey, sugar!
When you’re having the best sex in your life and your grandma says, “I’m not dead!”
What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him?
That’s assault!
What did the bee say to the other bee?
Moo.