Romance jokes

My sex life.

When Stephen Hawking was asked why he was instantly attracted to his new girlfriend, he said, "It's simple, she pushes all the right buttons."

*on a date*

me - "I get to work with animals all day."

her - "How sweet! What do you do?"

me - "I'm a butcher."

Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.

My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are... But I laugh more.