Religion jokes
A priest, a minister, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, "Is this a joke?"
Did Jesus die a virgin?
No... He got nailed! 😅
What's hot and hard?
Me when I look at children.
What’s the difference between a zit and a priest? The zit waits 'til you're 12 to cum on your face.
Father, then the priest says, "Son, Holy Spirit, amen." No, I was asking you a question, Father.
Bust it open for Jesus!
Jesus told me if I believed I would live for eternity. I believed, but at 97 I died...
I think Jesus is broken.
Your hairline is so far back that not even God knows about it.
ISIS is the mark of the beast.
It’s Christmas. Merry Christmin. Merry Chrirismas. Merry Chrisis. Merry Chrsyler.
Me: uses the crucifix.
Rush: Ahahahahahahæanananana!
Why does an orphan go to church?
So they can call someone "father."
Guys, this is so disrespectful, I love Jesus. I go to church every Tuesday morning to give Jesus a... giffffffft.
So disrespectful guys. #jesusismyhubby
Me: Mom, if Adam and Eve are white, then how were slaves made?
Mom: Well, Eve and the monkey fucked each other.
Me: Oh, okay.
Goes to school.
Teacher: How were humans made?
Me: Eve fucked the monkeys.
Teacher: 😑
Should I burn heaven?
What's the difference between Axne and a priest??
One waits till you're 13 to come on your face.
Why is a priest called "father?" It's too weird to call them "daddy."
Kenneth's hairline [is] friends with Moses.
Even your mother can never fix your hairline, just God.
Why Satan didn't stop sending messages to God about hell?
'Cause they made a juice out of him.