Religion jokes
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
God.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
What's the difference between a pope/preacher and acne?
Acne comes on your face when you're 13.
Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?
Because the children kept calling me "daddy."
Why are priests called father? Because it's too suspicious to call them daddy.
Did Jesus die virgin? Nope, he got nailed before he died.
You'd think the Catholic Church would be in favor of condoms... less DNA evidence.
Why do priests perform baptisms? So they can see children wet.
Baptism, a chance for the priest to bathe you.
Find Jaiden.
Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke Joke
Jaiden got lost after I looked for Jokes.
Also the Category is Jesus because Jesus got lost as well.
When I went to heaven, I saw Steven Hawking standing there. I asked why he isn’t in heaven yet. He said there are stairs.
A priest sees a man about to commit suicide. The man says, "I have nothing to live for here. I will die, go to Heaven, and get 72 virgins." Then the priest says, "No need for this. I will take you to the local elementary school."
What did God say when he made Jake Paul?
"Oops, I made a mistake."
Why do nuns walk in groups?
So one “nun” can keep an eye on the other “nun” just to make sure that she isn’t getting "nun".
What did Mother Mary say when God farted? Jesus Christ, you stink!
A priest asks a convicted murderer on the electric chair, "Do you have any last request?"
"Yes," said the murderer, "Will you hold my hand?"
Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.
A nun walked into a bar with her clothes on inside out. The bartender asked her about it, and she replied, "It's a bad habit."
A young couple gets banned from church.
There were three couples, one elderly, one middle-aged, and one newlywed, that wanted to join a church. So the minister tells them that in order to be members they must abstain from sex for two whole weeks.
After two weeks, the minister asks the elderly couple if they had abstained. "Yes, no problem!" So the minister welcomes them to the church.
Then he asks the middle-aged couple the same question, "Well, after one week, the husband had to sleep on the couch, but we made it!" So the minister welcomes them to the church.
Then the minister asks the newlywed couple if they had abstained from sex for two weeks.
"We were unable to abstain. On the third day, my wife dropped a can of corn and when she bent over to pick it up, LUST and PASSION overcame me! I took her right there."
"I'm sorry," the minister says, "but you are both banned from this church!"
"We understand," says the husband, "We were banned from the grocery store, too."