Predator

Predator Jokes

Prey

What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?

Let us prey.

Rooster

What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?

"No, you ate my cock!"

Child Molester

A child and a child molester walk into a forest together. The child turns to the molester and says, "Boy, these woods are scary." The molester says to the child, "You think you're scared? I have to walk out of here alone."

Bear

What do you get when you mix a grizzly bear and milk? Mauled.

Movie

What do you call a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bill Cosby?

Predator.

Catholic

What’s the difference between a Catholic and a rabbit?

One has kids to protect from predators, and the other has kids for predators.

Child

Are you a gun, because I would be your bullets because I love going in children.

Furry

Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.

Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.

Lion

A lion, Johnny Depp, and a hockey player from Nashville all have one thing in common.

They're all Predators!

Man

Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?

He grew up a Florida Man, after all.

Cheetah

I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.