Politics jokes

What was Hitler’s favorite sex position?

Sixty nein.

What do you get when you cross a bisexual male that is a catholic priest and a christian police officer that is a bisexual male and a born again homophobic heteroflexable male that is a christian nationalist who is in the closet a gay man that needs to be force out of the closet by any means necessary?

People: Stop invading Ukraine!

Putin: Ukraine? you mean Mykraine.

What do the initials NOW stand for?

(A.) National Organization For Women

(B.) National Organization of Whores

(C.) All the above

Answer:

Since the initials NOW can stand for anything, the correct answer is all the above.

Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?

His running mate has 34 of them!

Poor kids in American schools, they want books, but all they get are magazines.

The Trump cocktail. Take a large glass and fill it with an ounce of everything behind the bar. Top it with whipped cream and a cherry. Now for the hard part: finding a Mexican to pay for it.

Q: Why is Hitler better than Biden?

A: Because Hitler gave gas to his people for free.

There is a feminist group in my town.

It is called Gal-Qaeda.

(I actually got this from The Simpsons, so credit to the show.)

Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?

American: Self defense.

Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?

I'm shocked about Donald Trump escaping the transgender accusations. Trump is more talkative than any of the popular girls I went to school with! Not to mention Trump's tweets...

The Trump family are flying from New York to DC when Donald looks down on the cities below.

Trump: "I think I’ll throw a $1000 bill out the window and make some American happy."

Melania: "Oh honey, why not throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten Americans happy?"

Ivanka: "Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out the window and make 100 people happy."

Pilot: "Why don’t you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?"

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a dirty diaper?

Answer: none, they're both self-absorbed and full of sh*t!

In Portuguese, "Trumpa" means bullshit.

Trevor Bauer for President.

What is the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani primary school?

I don't know... I just fly the drone.

What do you call a frozen communist?

Hammer and popsicle.

Hillary Clinton

I once had a cat that reminded me of Doug Ford.

Fat, mean, and probably inbred.

Here's how to piss off all of North America.

All the United States is, is South Canadia.