Plastic

Plastic jokes

Reason

I'm not saying you're stupid.

But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"

Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson

What is Michael Jackson's favorite movie?

The Boy in the Plastic Bubble? Why? The boy who was in the bubble.

Memes

Song

At gym class today, my friend made this song:

🎵 I’m a Barbie girl, I am fantastic, my boobs are plastic!

Surgery

When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."

Body

How do you make a body disappear?

You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!

P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.

Body

Yo body so plastic that a turtle could choke on your peeled skin!

Lesbian

What do lesbians and turtles have in common?

They both eat plastic. (I'm sorry to the lesbians out there; this is a joke, not real.)

Mama

Yo mama is so ugly, when she went for plastic surgery, they accidentally gave her face a Brazilian Butt Lift!

Bungee Jumping

I refuse to go bungee jumping. I was brought into this world from broken plastic, and I REFUSE to die the same way.

Kardashians

I heard the Kardashians were going on a cruise soon.

As if there's not already enough plastic in the ocean.

Michael Jackson

What's the difference Michael Jackson and a play station have in common...

They're both plastic and kids turn them on.

Man

A man once went to a doctor because his leg was turning blue.

The doctor said that his leg had to be amputated as it was getting poisonous.

The man then got plastic prosthetics.

Next day even the prosthetics started turning blue.

After much examination, the doctor found that the patient's pants were shedding color.