What do you call a stupid mannequin?
A dummy.
Plastic Jokes
What do you call a white bucket?
A pail.
I'm not saying you're stupid.
But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"
My favorite kind of face mask is the plastic bag.
What do Michael Jackson and a plastic bag have in common?
They both are plastic and like kids.
Q: Why does Michael Jackson live in a Barbie world?
A: ♫He's made of plastic, it's fantastic!♪
At gym class today, my friend made this song:
🎵 I’m a Barbie girl, I am fantastic, my boobs are plastic!
When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
Yo body so plastic that a turtle could choke on your peeled skin!
What do lesbians and turtles have in common?
They both eat plastic. (I'm sorry to the lesbians out there; this is a joke, not real.)
Yo mama is so ugly, when she went for plastic surgery, they accidentally gave her face a Brazilian Butt Lift!
Plastic bags look like you, dirty and fake.
I refuse to go bungee jumping. I was brought into this world from broken plastic, and I REFUSE to die the same way.
What does Kylie Jenner feed her baby? Plastic MILK! LOL
A man once went to a doctor because his leg was turning blue.
The doctor said that his leg had to be amputated as it was getting poisonous.
The man then got plastic prosthetics.
Next day even the prosthetics started turning blue.
After much examination, the doctor found that the patient's pants were shedding color.
What's the difference Michael Jackson and a play station have in common...
They're both plastic and kids turn them on.
True Story
A CO was receiving inmates as they're being recalled from their assigned jobs to prepare for count. An inmate that had passed the officer returned bleeding through his trousers from his crotch. The inmate had an argument with his lover who had told him that he wasn't enough woman for him. As the inmate was bleeding he was crying out, "He doesn't love me anymore!"
The officer called for medical assistance and went into the assigned cell. He found the severed penis. He fished it out of the toilet and placed it in a plastic bag with ice. He claimed that the medical staff at the hospital could reattach it. He took a ribbing from his fellow officers, because most would've flushed it. I retired and months later saw a fellow officer at the store. As we caught up, I mentioned that the last incident I responded to was 'the severed penis.' The officer tells me that the inmate severed his penis again after it was reattached and flushed it himself.
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 😷
I never liked unnatural adult stars with implants and face surgeries because they look photoshopped, and they always need a ton of lube to get into due to how plastic they are.
