Pet jokes
What is a doll's favorite dog? A doll-matian.
My dog was hungry, so I let him loose outside while I filled his bowl.
I found out later that he was run over by a truck. It seemed to really hit the Spot.
How do you turn a baby into a dog?
Douse it in gasoline, light a match, *WOOF*!
Why do cats like to sing? They're very mewsical!
Whenever I see a dog video, I just take a second to press paws.
My cat got run down. That is a cat-astrophe.
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal was a dog.
It was a shih tzu.
I'm happy that I named my dog "I Know What You Did." It's funny to see how much people get scared when I call him.
"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Suzie, looking out of the kitchen window.
"I know," said her mother, "I've just stepped in a poodle!"
What did the bounty hunter call his favorite dog?
His Boba Pet.
What is a Mexican's favorite type of dog?
A Chihuahua.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter; he's not coming.
Where do you find a dog with no arms or legs?
Where you left it.
I used to have a friend who worked at a car shop who liked hunting.
I’m not friends with him anymore because he turned my dog into a car-pet.
What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A Labracadabrador.
What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him for a drag.
How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"
I named my dog Syndrome, so when he sits on my couch I say, “Get down, Syndrome!”
What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!
What does Hellen Keller call her dog?
"NAUSHFBUYGWF"