Pet jokes
Mom: There is so much of the dog's dirty ball marks.
Me: *umm ohh no* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA dirty balls!
Q: What's the similarity between a dog and a bed?
A: I can jump on my bed. A: And I use a pillow on both of them.
I once had a pet snake, exactly 3.14 meters.
He was a great πthon.
The thing about animals is every time you pick one up, you have to put it down.
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
Why don’t you have a pet cheetah?
There cheetah you.
Why is the chicken that crossed the road a cannibal? Because he went to KFC.
Okay, One time I there was my dog. But then the dog, it fell.
Then I f**ked my dog hard in the a**.
When a cat gets a sibling, do they say, "Oh, shit! Another mew kid?!?!?!"
Why did the dog join the marching band?
Because he had his trum-bone.
I named my dog "J," and everyone thought I said "jam."
Is your middle name Fancy Feast?
'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
You got a black cat.
He was bad luck.
Everyone left you and you committed suicide.
What a CATastrophe!
What did the squirrel say to the dog?
"There are nuts in your poop. I found them!"
What do you call a rabbit who is really cool?
I love my dog, Sadie.
What is the difference between a human and a magic dog night?
Hi! I love my dog.
I did a good walk and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and people live in the house with my dog. I had to a dog and.