Pet jokes
Zozo the hobo has two frogs and a bunny cage from pet expo. Why? Because he wanted a pet, you idiot!
What should you name a dog without any legs?
It doesn't really matter. No matter what you yell, he's not coming.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it, 'cause it ain't gonna come to you.
A girl and a dog were dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog.
I had to get my dog. Is it a tree? Was your time and I had fun today after dinner. I had...
What time is it when you get home? Can you walk walk and a car and get home and get a walk home and get a dog 🐕? Today is the night I can drive.
What has a dog?
People.
I love ❤️ dogs.
What is a dog that does not walk? A magic dog.
What is a dog that is awesome? A smart dog.
What did the cat say to the jar of cookies?
"Ground beef!"
What time do dogs 🐕 get a walk done ✅?
Time to walk with your dog 🐶!
My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.
A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"
About a dog.
What is a dog that is Christmas?
A Christmas tree dog!
What is so good about a dog that cannot see? Nothing is good.
Why did the dog walk out at night?
To scare his people!
What do you call a cat 🐈 that is glued down? A big cluck.
What did one cat say to the other? Happy "meow"!
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat.