Person jokes

Forehead

When someone throws something at your forehead, it stops moving and goes into orbit around your forehead.

Orphan

Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*

Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.

Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?

Memes

Language

If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language?

An American.

Mistake

When someone says: "You're a mistake."

Say: "The only mistake I see is right in front of me."

Height

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

Baby

I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.

So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.

Gun

A Japanese person comes to America and sees guns everywhere. One American says, "Welcome to America!"

Teacher

In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"

In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"

High-five

Why do you always high five the emo person? 'Cause you can't just leave them hanging.

Therapy

If a person kills their counselor, does that mean that they don't need therapy anymore?

Knock knock

Me: Knock, knock.

Other person: Who’s there?

Me: Atch.

Other person: Atch who?

Me: Bless you!