Person jokes
What is a homeless person's favorite joke?... Themselves.
Who do you ask to wipe you? Your butler!
What do you call a person who keeps making jokes about rappers?
An annoying prick whose black dad left him as a kid.
They say there's a person capable of murder in every friendship group. I suspected it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck her in a round room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
Next person that says 67, I am gonna yell "9/11" and sweep their feet.
Somebody told another person that they would meet at the crack of dawn.
Let's just say Dawn got very mad.
Someone asked me my gender... I said, "Woah, man."
Isn't it ironic that the actually nice people tend to be suicidal?
Think about it: suicide exists to make sure bad people bother each other instead.
Joker: How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
Person: Because he felt it in his bones?
Joker: He read the weather forecast, you f*cking idiot.
What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?
A baked potato.
I am disabled and I find these jokes appropriately hilarious.
Regular depressed person: I'm depressed, so I'll go see a therapist.
Me: I'm depressed, so I won't do anything about it, work on many projects at the same time, destroying my sanity slowly while relying on caffeine and pills as my only way to take down my headaches, and making memes about it online to help myself cope with the pain.
Rape jokes aren’t funny!!! And definitely not something to joke about, what’s wrong with ppl, like seriously what a world we live in. This is sick!
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
What's the difference between a homeless person and a car?
Only one gets fuel.
How do you know if an Asian has been in your house?
Your dog's gone.
Your finances are done.
And your floaties.
This one time I said to a person that they are dry, then I was wet (ba dum tiss).
My bully said I have to shut up. I said, "Shut down" (ba dum tiss).
How do you make a blind person jealous? You ask if it's a nice day out.
Person 1: Why did you put the baby feet first into the blender? Person 2: To see his facial expression. Why else?