Performance jokes
Why was the rapper cold in the recording studio?
Because his bars were ice.
What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?
Guarded.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
What’s a rapper’s favorite martial art?
Punchlines.
How does a rapper start a race?
With a ready, set, FLOW!
why th
What did the rapper say to the computer?
“Yo, stop laggin’ my FLOW!”
Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?
Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)
Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.
Me: *Confused*
Sister: They're both horrible.
Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?
He woke up and found out it was true.
Once I was asked to perform snail jokes at a stand-up comedy night. I certainly snailed it because the crowd thought it was shellerious.
Why do we tell actors to "break a leg"?
Because every play has a cast! Get it? Lol.
You know what's the most awkward situation in the world? A rapper with erectile dysfunction.
"I hear you asking, 'What's your favorite instrument?' The Trombone."
What do you call an accomplished opera singer with recurring gonorrhea?
Standing ovation!
What's the difference between Lana Del Rey and Milli Vanilli?
Milli Vanilli won a Grammy.
I was at a concert in the front row, and I shouted something to the band's guitarist. He took it the wrong way and responded: "I'm going to go down there and hit you with my guitar!"
And I replied: "Is that a death fret?"
A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.
Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?”
Because every play has a cast.
He wasn't that bad.
I was anonymous with the previous jokes. I will now go by "I can fly! *falls*."
What's black and white and red all over? A mime I hit with my car.
Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?
Because he was searching for the PERFECT FLOW.