Parent jokes

Why do an emo's parents not let them cook, because they are afraid they will cut themselves?

What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?

They cry...

They scream... with joy.

"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."

Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...

What's the difference between parents and a boomerang?

The boomerang comes back from the store with milk.

An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.

A: Why did the orphan not come to school today?

B: Because today we had a parent meetup.

Why does the orphan not buy milk?

That's what their parents are doing.

So, an orphan walked into a store. He gets lost and the store clerk asked, "Do you need help finding your parent?" and the orphan ran out crying.

Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents, and I lost my job as zookeeper.

Why did the orphan cross the road?

Because they thought they saw their parents. (Plot twist: the orphan got ran over.)

Kid: Dad, what's an orphan?

Dad:

What do you call a fish with no parents?

An orfin.

Mom: It's time for sleep.

Baby: Is that what you think, huh?

Mom: *gives baby pacifier*

Baby: Nice try, hobo.

Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.

*few hours later*

Baby: *still awake*

Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!

Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.

Your mom's my dad. Think about that!

Girl: Come over.

Orphan: I can’t.

Girl: My parents aren’t home ;)

Orphan: Just two things I don’t have.

Fun fact: If you're an orphan, you probably don't know your parents.

My parents said to me, "Whenever you say sorry to someone and they say, 'It's okay,' it's really not."

So I said, "Okay."

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"

What kind of shirts does Sally's parents get her?

Long sleeves.

What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?

"That is bull crap!"

So, I was walking around the outside of the building and I saw a kid and asked, "Where's your parents?" I love working at the orphanage.