Ownership

Ownership Jokes

Bike

I saw a little kid on their bike before. So I ran home to see if it was mine. Mine was still chained up, so weโ€™re good.

Life

I liked my life when I first got it... Later they said no because I didnโ€™t have the receipt.

Difference

Whatโ€™s the difference between a hundred decapitated babies and a Ferrari? I donโ€™t have a Ferrari in my garage.

Bar

Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says, "what's the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks?" The man says, "it's not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place."

Visitor

My friend just got a new house. He told me to make myself at home, so I threw him out. I hate visitors.

Porsche

What's the difference between a Porsche and 50 dead babies?

..... I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

Dog

My girlfriend's dog died, so I got her a new one in replacement, and she went off on me and yelled,

"What am I supposed to do with 2 dead dogs in my house?!"

Lamborghini

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

Woman

Whatโ€™s the difference between women and cars?

At least cars retain some of their value after getting wrecked.

Businessman

Two businessmen bought the Milwaukee Bucks for $500 million. They are very excited about their transaction, for this is the only legal way to own black people.

Baby

Whatโ€™s the difference between a dumpster full of dead babies and a Lamborghini?

I donโ€™t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

Rock

When you steal the weird pet rock, so he pulls out his pet Glock.

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  • Motorcycle

    Whatโ€™s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?

    I donโ€™t have a motorcycle in my garage.

    Dog

    My dog got mad at me for touching his toy. Do you know what he said?

    "Get your paws off!" ๐Ÿ’ฉ๐Ÿ’ฉ๐Ÿ’ฉ