Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*
Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?
Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me
me: brings in missing child police: omg this kid has been missing for 3 months. here is your reward me: oh, cool
NEXT DAY
me: brings in 8 other kids
police :0 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side
(Omg omg literally dislike im so cringe)
Teenager: "OMG, I’m prego, my mom's gonna kill me."
Baby: "Lmao, same"
Boy : “My heart MELTS for you.” Girl : “OMG, are you okay?!?!?!” Boy : “Yeah, why?” Girl : “Because if your heart is melting, then you are NOT okay.”
Did you hear that oxygen and magneseum hooked up last night? OMg!
omg you wanna hear a joke ? nah i don't care
Girls Dreams - OMG my crush kissed me Boys dreams - I just got a dub bro
What's up
A rocket from NASA
OMG SO FUNNYY
Me: *gets down on one knee*
Girlfriend: OMG, it's finally happening!
Me: *falls over*
Girlfriend: The poison is kicking in.
Me: *stabs vampire*
Wife: omg
Me: *beats vampire to death*
Wife: OMG
Me: What?
Wife: You're supposed to give them candy!
Me: Well, that's a sticky situation now, isn't it, Barbara?
me: I'm going to steal your heart.
her: omg that's so romantic!!
me, an organ trafficker: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Mom: I'm getting you a dog!
Me: OMG REALLY?!
Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?
Me: ...
Me: Bitch please.
OMG TYSM FOR HELPING ME REACH 30 FOLLOWERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🎆
Guys look at the comments omg
Say Hey your pretty then she'll say omg thank you so much or something cringe then you say pretty f ing ugly aha gottie
????: Omg my Blind Boyfriend cheated on me
Me: what did you expect him to see other hoes...
Obama: It smells like upnigga in here... Trump: What's upnigga Obama: Omg did you say the n word?? Die!!!
Roses are red the forest is bushy omg did u jusy cum in my pussy
ME: i hit a orphan! MOM: OMG WHY? ME:not like they can tell there parents-
