Did Jesus die a virgin?
Of course not, he got nailed before he died!
Not Jokes
Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.
Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."
Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?
Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.
I might not be able to make my bed, but at least I can get out of it.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents :) so kawaii fr.
Dark humor is like water; not everyone gets it.
Why didn't the Twin Towers order cheese pizza?
They like pepperoni, not plane!
Little Johnny: Hey, Dad, are you finally back with the milk?
Dad: Yea, but it's expired, so I'm going back to the "milk store" and get more (and not come back for a couple more years). :)
Twinkle, twinkle, there’s a car Coming like a shooting star.
I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
Hey Gwen, listen, I know you're on this app, fake or not. I love you either way. Please find this faker and finish her off for what she's done, real Gwen.
*You're a real best Gwen*
Why can an orphan never get picked up?
Because the white van did not come that day. HAHA BIG LOL
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? You're not dead.
Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?
1. Listening to your teacher.
2. Not having your phone/game/TV.
3. Not having nicotine.
Why do orphans not build houses in Minecraft? Because they want it to be realistic.
Not a joke, but this needs saying. Please can someone do something about all the pedo posts on here. It’s honestly just nasty.
It's not Minecraft.
It's Ourcraft!
They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.
It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.
Pro tip: How to not hit your thumb with a hammer, make your child hold the nail.
There never was a historical Jesus Christ. Hey, do not even dream of crucifying me.
How is sex like air?
It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
I am not making a noose; I am making an unsubscribe button for life.
