Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
When you slap the mosquito, it stops sucking.
What do you call a clock on a belt?
A waist of time.
Did you hear about the guy who got his left side chopped off?
Well, he’s all right now!
Why did the liberal cross the road?
(Ah, fuck this shit, I'm gonna kill myself!)
What's the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.
You travel to the past into the era where Julius Caesar is still alive. He thinks you may be from the future to bring him good news. He asks you, "How do I die?"
You reply with: "Surrounded by friends."
Tyson?
Yo mama so stupid that when the mirror cracked, she tried to order another one.
In Antarctica, there are ice dicks for ladies to hop onto.
Little do they know I've been waiting for this moment.
Hmmm.
Check out my YouTube Channel! (Gamer Zacoo01).
What do you say to Stephen Hawking when he dies?
"Rust in pieces!"
What is the reason for the first time since I've seen a lot to be desired in the morning? To you, eat ass...
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get the Chinese Daily!
Get it? I don't either--I get the New York Times!
What do you call a girl that likes reading? Page.
Apparently, describing the beautiful city of Hiroshima as "The bomb" is not okay.
What do a convention of nerds and Kurt Cobain's garage have in common?
There's brains all over the place.
I almost had a joke about Parkinson's disease, but I was too shaken up to say it.
I recently found out that my grandma died. We did an autopsy, and the results came back. They were pretty shocking.
We found out that she died............... from an autopsy.
What was the last thing on the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?
...
...
Their knees.
*Ba dum tss*
Beans