Worst Jokes Ever
What does the Titanic sell most?
Icebreakers.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop!
Why doesn't Voldemort have a human nose?
Because his snake bit it off!
I hate 9/11 jokes... They always crash and burn, like, dude, it's not funny?
Harry Potter
Dobby: "Dobby never meant to kill, Dobby only meant to maim or seriously injure!"
Jumanji
Coach Webb: "Ok, there's a lot wrong with that."
Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant all her friends touch her stomach and say “congrats,” but none of them touch the man’s penis and say “well done?”
Repost
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? The apple got picked.
Did you hear about the kidnapping? Yeah, he woke up.
Why is the beach friendly?
Because it waves!
Bored?
Burn an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the similarity between a broken pencil and my life?
They're both pointless.
I was going to log a pun about trees, but you wooden understand it.
I was playing baseball with orphans, but when they hit a homerun, they had nowhere to go.
My dad, unfortunately, passed away when we couldn’t remember his blood type...
His last words to us were, “Be positive!”
Why are Democrats represented by the donkey? Because some Democrats can be such an ass!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
What's the difference between my wife and a battery? I can't use a battery when it dies.
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards?
DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!