Worst Jokes Ever
At this point, I don't want a funeral when I commit. I just want a going away party so people have an excuse to celebrate.
"Why can’t you be comfortable with my own body?"
"I think you should ask yourself that."
What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.
Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.
Why do orphans can't play baseball? They don't know where home is.
Teacher: What is your least favorite holiday?
Orphan: National Forgive Your Mom And Dad Day.
Teacher: Why is that your least favorite?
Orphan: Because I don't have any parents to forgive.
Teacher: *tries to hold back* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
Why did the orphan go to a church?
So he could call someone "father."
Why do orphans not like July 24th??
Because it's Parents Day.
What is wrong with orphans' phones?
They'll never have a home screen.
Why shouldn't you make an orphan cry?
Because they won't have a parent to cry to.
Why should you put an orphanage by a cemetery?
So they can always see their parents.
How is toilet paper recycled?
Easier than you would think, but first they have to process the crap out of it.
Why did orphans play Poppy Playtime?
To get a family.
The more emos there are, the less emos there are.
What is Labor Day? That’s when mommies have their babes.
Leave a like if you like sex and porn, and talk to me if you have any questions.
What do you call a disabled person that can walk?
Enabled.
Why do all orphans have an iPhone X?
Because it doesn't have a home button.
What do you call an orphan's family photo?
A selfie.
After arriving home from helping the priest, a young altar boy approaches his parents, "Mommy, Daddy, my poop is white!"
The mother rushes the boy to the hospital, while the father rushes to church in a rage and proceeds to beat the living hell out of the priest. Afterwards, the father heads to the hospital and meets his wife in the waiting room; she's surprisingly calm.
"How can you be so relaxed after what that bastard has been doing to our son?" he exclaims.
The wife looks up at him, "What are you talking about? It's just a liver infection!"