Worst Jokes Ever

What do you call it when someone fucks shoe inserts?

Orthopediphilia.

What do you call a Mexican with one leg?

Border hopper.

Roses are red, flowers are pretty, I heard your mom has a nice pair of titties.

I don’t like to make jokes around dwarfs.

Simply because they look up to me.

Why do dwarfs do drugs?

To get high.

Why did the dwarf work at Tesco?

Because every little bit helps!

What did the cow say to the leather chair?

“Hi Mom!”

What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?

They are both legless.

What do you call an orphan’s family reunion?

Me time.

My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.

What did the water say to the cup?

"Good day!"

Know your ABCs! Assholes, bitches, and cocaine!

What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?

Van Halen's "Jump."

What song do you play at a emo kid's funeral?

House of Pain—"Jump Around."

I told my brother if he wanted to have a wonderful first day of school, then he should put a cookbook in the women's sports section at the school library.

My favorite thing to do in libraries is put cookbooks in the women’s sports section.

What game do emo kids love the most?

Hangman.

We aren't ghosts, but I'll take you under the sheets.

Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.

They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.