Need jokes
Yes, I have gained weight. I have also gained more brains. Do you want some? You talk like you definitely need some more.
My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"
I said, "Paper."
She said, "Really?"
I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"
Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.
Dad: "Honey, I'll be right back. I need to get some papers."
Me: "Okay." *Falls asleep.*
*Wakes up in an adoption center.*
Damn, it was those kind of papers.
What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?
Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?
bro needs to chill out, like it's not that deep, like every toon knows you like dandy just admit astro you like dandy fr, like it's not that deep
Why can’t an orphan go to a youth church? Because they need a parent to pick them up.
Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.
So, my mom looked in the mirror today, and we need a new one.
We need to stop making orphan jokes like this because they aren’t mean enough. We need more cruel jokes.
Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.
Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.
Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.
Amber: Fine!!!!!
The village people said that they need their idiot back; you better get going!
Why was the fart on Kickstarter? He just needed some gas.
Why do you need an AR-15?
So my son can use it if he's being bullied at school.
Don't flirt when there is Life Alert!
Edna: Hey there big boy!
Big boy: You need to stop doing this.
Umm, what joke should I make?
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”
💔 The Broken Family 💔 . Part 1
Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.
Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)
Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.
Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)
Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.
Mom: But what he did was wrong.
Girl: I know.
(SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)
Mom: Is that ur dad.
Girl: Yes Mom
Comment Part 2
You need to play a B flat, not a C sharp, you just got band!
If a man and a woman need a marriage license to get married, does a lesbian couple need a liquor license to get married?
Why can't an orphan go to school? He needs a parent admission form to get in.