Me and my brother were called the twin towers. My brother lived up to his title after the plane crash.
Morbid Jokes
When your friend does a finger-gun and his dad appears behind him and does it too, with the real deal!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled too far away from the outlet on the wall.
What do you call an all-you-can-eat buffet for a pedophile? A school bus.
Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbor.
Police: Where is your neighbor’s house?
Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me.
Police: Tell me.
Me: Next to my house.
What did the mute man tell the blind man?
Nothing.
Me: Hey Jim!
Jim: I'm now a cannibal.
Me: WAIT, JIM! N-
God sent gays to fix overpopulation. Until they ended same-sex marriage.
What's good about 9/11? It helped solve the world's overpopulation issue.
I will never forget my Grandpa's last words: "What are you doing with that rope and saw?"
What's long, black and full of seamen? A submarine.
Willies.
Why couldn't the Japanese man give a high five?
Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
What is sprinkled around the Pokémon floor? Oh right. Ash's ashes.
What's better than swinging a baby around on a rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
What does Earl Bradley and an Xbox have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
My dad is like Hurricane Katrina. I haven’t seen either since 2005.
My credit card is more declined than the love from my dad.
Jesus created the T-pose first.
I found Nemo.
He was tasty.
