I heard he's doing a revival tour next month. It's called "Stephen Hawking Unplugged."
The cancer patient asked the doctor how many more months he had to live. The doctor replied, "Tu-more."
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that, as a punishment, she won't eat butter for 1 month.
Today I saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her "nice try".
What is Hitler's least favorite month?
Jewly.
Can February march? -- No, but April may.
What do lesbian vampires say after sex?
"See you next month."
