Mom jokes
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer too long!
My mom has a toy that I see all the girls and guys seem to play with, and the toy is between my mom's legs.
I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.
Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.
So, my mom was talking to me and told me to go to the store. When I get there, there’s a sign, but then someone tells me that’s just someone with a ginormous forehead.
People say my dad left me and was never successful, but if you search up who destroyed the Twin Towers, he will pop up.
Also, my mom's great grandpa killed Hitler.
Memes
I asked, "Mom, what's that in the sky?"
Mom replied with, "That's your father."
Little boy: Momma?
Mom: Yes, my dear.
Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.
Mom: Why!?
Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.
Your mom's a whore, and so are you!
Me: I hit an orphan!
Mom: OMG WHY?
Me: Not like they can tell their parents-
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
Boy: Hello, Mom, can I have $50?
Mom: Does it look like I am made of money?
Boy: That's what M.O.M. means, right?
I have an Uncle named Ricky, who made ur mom sticky.
His dad calls him pricky and everyone begs for his dicky.
Depression: Here, your mom just died.
Me: My mom is already dead.
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
Your mother.
Ur mom.
Oops my bad! 😬
What did the orphan say to its parents?
"Hey, Mom and Dad—oh wait, you're not my parents. I don't have none. Will you adopt me, please?"
They people: "No."
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I saw your mom beat you.
Three Things I Want For Christmas From Santa:
1. A Lambo
2. A House
3. UR MOM
Why did your mom cross the road?
Why? She didn't, she got hit by a car.