Miscellaneous Jokes

I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.

I just ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon.

I'll let you know.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Por que.

Por que who?

"That's all, folks," in the words of Por que Pig.

If seagulls fly over the sea, what flies over the bay?

Bagels.

Sally fell off the swing.

Sally has no arms.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Not Sally.

I'd make a joke about corn, but it's too corny.

Then again, I could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. My funny bone is broken. I guess it was because those jokes were too humerus.

What is the difference between a snowman and a snow girl?

Snowballs.

"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Suzie, looking out of the kitchen window.

"I know," said her mother, "I've just stepped in a poodle!"

The inmates are yelling 12...12...12... in the courtyard.

A man walking by is interested why the keep chanting 12...12...12... so he sticks his head through the fence and the inmate poked the man in the eye.

Moment later they start chanting 13...13...13...

Jacob has a small penis.

I got hit by a bus.

But the bus was my ex.

Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/

Yes.

Miss Stephen likes sex like she likes kids.

On a desk in pure isolation.

A woman ran into a police station screaming, "Help, I have been graped!" The policeman said, "Do you mean raped?" The woman said, "No, there was a bunch of them!"