Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Your mom.
Your mom who?
O shit, my mom's home! Honey, get the f*** out of my house!
Miscellaneous Jokes
What is the difference between a dog and a cat?
I don't know either.
Why do you think I asked you? ;)
Why do you go to the bank?
To get money.
When do you run from the bank?
When the cops come.
When do you go at stop and stop when done?
I don't know, I'm not a pedophile.
Do you like doors?
Yes, because you are adoorable.
What did Adam say when he saw Eve?
Answer: "Woman!"
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Roses are red, Kevin Spacey is gay,
If you'd stayed with your parents, I wouldn't have taken you away.
I got hit by a bus.
But the bus was my ex.
What's long, black and full of seamen? A submarine.
Cyber bully: Your mom giey.
Me: nO U
When you send a dick pic and she sends one back,
I'm glad mine is the biggest, so I get to fuck my dad again.
What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill?
Taco Bell going out of business.
What's the best part about beating up an orphan?
They can't tell their parents.
What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
"I'm not sure why my girlfriend's father doesn't like me."
"What was your first impression on him?"
"I told him, she calls me daddy too."
The point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the fresh recruit on the enemy's side die for his.
So today an old lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her... Hhah.
My sister got in a car crash a couple days ago. When she got to the hospital, the doctor told her that she needed to get metal mechanics in her leg.
She got really scared and yelled at the doctor, telling them that, “I will not get those implanted in my leg.” I guess she just doesn’t associate with knee gears.
Your daddy must be a drug dealer, because you're dope.
