Milk jokes

What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.

I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.

So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.

The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"

The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"

Your mama is so ugly! It took your dad 15 years to return from getting milk.

What did the dad say to the kid?

Nothing, he went to get the milk.

You know why the teacher punished Dairy Milk?

Answer: Because he was choco_'late' to school.

What do you call a roach in milk?

A roach con leche. 😂

Bruh, people always makin' jokes 'bout how their dad left, well in my story it was the mum that needed milk.

Why do orphans like milk so much?

Because they got no milk as a baby.

What’s the bravest thing a man can do?

Say, “I’m going to get milk!” to his wife and kids.

What is a milk?

Milk!!!!

Why did orphans have to drink their own piss?

Because last time they went to the bar, they went with their dad and drank some Corona, then got drunk and started eating someone's toenails, so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody had to evacuate the bar. Then the orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world, so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to, so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldn't die and loved it. So then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking, so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on YouTube, and the boy became famous, so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk, then the little boy became really rich.

What does Kylie Jenner feed her baby? Plastic MILK! LOL

What's the difference between America and a bottle of milk?

In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture.

What is the difference between 9/11 and a cow?

You stop milking a cow after 15 years.

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? -- Because they lactose.

Guy spills milk on me. I say, "It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes, but apparently your mom made a big one."

I have a stepladder. My real ladder left for milk and never came back.

I have no father or no milk. Like if you relate.

Q: What do you get when you cross a cow and a smurf?

A: Blue cheese.