Mental Health jokes

Is depression sadness or happiness? I call it a fun time.

There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.

What caused the Great Depression? A lack of comedians.

What do you call a group of emo kids?

The suicide squad.

Why is James depressed?........ because he's a bitch.

I'd make an emo joke, but that would be cutting a little too close.

I called the suicide hotline in Iraq. The person got excited and asked if I can drive a truck.

In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.

One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”

If depression on crack fucked weed and 69 hours of not sleeping and had a baby with huge amounts of autism, that would be me.

Your momma's so depressed, she shot herself in the head hoping she'd die.

Dave got a new job at the suicide hotline.

The manager shows him to his desk and Dave has a seat.

The manager says, "Remember! Your job is to make sure that the person at the other end of the line does not kill himself, no matter what! That's the one thing you have to do!"

Dave says "No problem! I will do exactly what you just told me!" and the manager leaves him to his job.

A few minutes, later Dave's phone rings.

"Hello?" Dave answers. No response for a few seconds, then a voice appears.

"My wife cheated on me," a man says. The man on the other end of the line is clearly depressed.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Dave says.

"I found out that she's been doing it for months; she says I don't treat her well enough. She's filing for divorce and threatening to take the kids from me. I don't know what to do. I just took up drinking and gambling, the pain goes away at first but it always comes back. I don't think I can even afford to see a psychiatrist; money is tight as it always is. I wish I could manage my finances better... I just don't see any way out. I think the only thing I can do that makes sense is to just kill myself."

Dave pauses for a moment, thinks, and then he asks:

"Wouldn't it make more sense to kill her?"

I hope ya'll that have depression kys; you are worthless trash.

Just kidding.

The fourth month (symbolizing 41%) on the first day, transgenders mourn for the trans suicides.

That day is called "April Fool's."

My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house.

So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard. One said, "What tree?"

I replied, "You’ll know when you get here!"

My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.

What’s an Emo’s favorite exercise?

The dead hang.

What is an emo's favorite movie?

The Suicide Squad.

What do you call an emo with a knife?

A cutting board.

To anyone suffering from low self esteem:

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UTymDoPOEnY

I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...

I used to be emo.

I'm surprised that the tree is still standing when my emo friend is hanging from it.

To whoever stole my antidepressants, why do you need them?