Men

Men jokes

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Abortion

  • A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.

    When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"

    God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."

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  • Bomb

  • There is a room of men: Jamal, David, and Afzul. "Jamal is black," "David is white," and "Afzul is a Pakistani." Who set off the bomb?

    Afzul, it's clearly him cause he's a Pakistani...

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    Garbage

  • There are 3 men: an American, a French, and an Italian who have to take a trip and take the plane.

    The American puts his hand out the window and says: "We are in America, I touched the Statue of Liberty." The French says: "We are in France, I touched the Eiffel Tower." The Italian says: "We are in Italy, I touched the garbage!"

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    Sister

  • One day I was going home, and 7 married men came to me and said, "You should be proud of your sister." I asked why. They told me it was the best that they ever had, and we got your sister a trophy.

    So I went home, my sister said, "Look at my trophy I earned." The trophy said "The Best Blow Jobs." As a bro, I couldn’t be more prouder.

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    Rape

  • Rape is no laughing matter. The reason why women are not believed in rape is because of you mother fucking shitbirds with no future who will become drunkards and drug dealers who go broke and live on the street getting hit by a fucking car. Fuck all of you sadists who think this kind of shit is funny, well shut the fuck up. Go jump off a bridge or get hit by car and I hope you fucking sickos die.

    Stop rape. Stop rappe. Stop rapibg innocent children and women and men. I am done with rape. I am done with it!

    Jesus

  • Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?

    Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.

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    Fireman

  • There's a kid with loads of new firemen equipment and sees a fire engine go past and the kid asks the firemen, "Come have a look at my new gear." So the firemen go look at his gear, so then the kid says:

    "I've got a helmet, a big jacket, and an oxygen tank, and a little wheelbarrow for my gear."

    Firemen say: "Why is there a rope tied around a cat's balls?"

    The kid says, "So I can have a siren nnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn"

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    Wife

  • Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?

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    Glory Hole

  • Why did the NBA remove the glory hole from the men's locker room?

    Too many black basketball players sucking too many white cocks before the game.

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