What did Gandalf say to Mario? You shell not pass!
My father is like Houdini, when he heard his girlfriend was pregnant he disappeared.
For all the Harry Potter fans:
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a man walks up to lil johnny one day and asks if you had one wish but that wish will be granted to everyone on earth so the lil johnny thinks real hard and long then said well i would wish for me to shit my self and the man is shocked and asks why and lil johnny reply's well i would be on the toilet i thing everyone else would just be confused
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Little Johnny was walking down an alley and saw a lamp. After he rubbed it a genie came out and said "You have 10 seconds to have one wish". Little Johny says he wants to pee alcohol. The genie grants his wish. He tells his family and his sister doesn't believe it. After having a drink she says, "We should have this every night!". Little Johny gets two cups every night one for him and his sister. He does the same thing for four nights. Eventually he ran out of cups and has one left. He gives on himself and his sister asks, "Wheres my cup?". little Johny replied, "Your drinking out of the bottle tonight".
A guy goes into his attic to clean it out and finds an old oil lamp. He thinks he could sell it instead of throwing it away, so he starts to rub it and out pops this genie. The genie says to him " Thank you for awakening me, I can grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude." The guy wishes for a billion dollars, the genie grants it. The guy then asks for a huge mansion with 2 Lamborghinis and 2 Ferraris, the genie grants it. The genie says "This is your last wish so really make this one count." The guys says "Well I've always wanted to drive out to hawaiian islands, because airplanes scare me to death, so I would want a highway that could stretch from here all the way to the islands." The Genie says "That is asking for quite a lot and I'm not sure if I can pull that off, Is there anything else you'd want?" The guy says "Well I've been married and divorced three times, and I just can't understand what I've been doing wrong. I've given my ex-wives all the love and care that I could but in the end it was never enough. I would want to have the ability to understand women. The genie thinks for a few moments and says "Do you want a three or four lane highway?"
Three boys are playing on a slide when a genie appeared.
The genie says "what ever you shout when you go down the slide, I will grant you a bucket full of."
The first boy goes down the slide shouting "diamonds!", and he gets a bucket of diamonds.
The second boy goes down the slide and shouts "gold!", and gets a bucket of gold.
The third boy, who never listens or pays attention, goes down the slide and shouts "weeeeeeee!".
the harry potter fanbase
Guys say βI love gape hornβ really loud and you will get good luck for 10 yesrs
If A wizard gets robbed by a muggle, has he been MUGGLED?????
draco malfoy had a wand fight in the bathroom
Whatβs a orphans favorite cereal.
Because itβs the only magical sting in his life
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says: If i can suprise you, i get a free drink. The bartender was unsure but agreed. The guy pulled up a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket and he starts to play The bartender was suprised and gave the guy a free drink The guy then sais: You see, i have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes, can i get another free drink if you get a free wish? The bartender agrees without hesitation The bartender wishes for a 1000 bucks, but he gets a 1000 ducks WTF! the man shouts. The guy answered: Did you think i wanted a 30cm long pianist
why doesnt voldemort have a human nose? because his snake bit it of
How many fingers does the Dragonborn have?
Four fingers and a Thu'um.
If a Indian had powers it's would be throwing tika masala
What is the difference between harry houdini and everyone else in my life, harry was the only person not to disappear
I make weed disappear, what's your super power?
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love Man: I wish not to die a virgin Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality
