Like jokes

Dagger. This is to get your attention, for Dagger Jr. and I. We'd like to speak with you, and possibly Lynx, if we can find a time to all talk.

I play saxophone, and I like to tell everyone I am a registered s/o (short for saxophone operator) in hopes of one day starting a jazz band, but now everyone looks at me weird, and when I go to house parties to perform, everyone hides their children, but little do they know I LOVE children. For some reason, I got multiple restraining orders because I said, “I want to touch the kids so they can one day become musicians themselves... like Michael Jackson.” I have then since moved from my hometown to Florida, where I can meet up with other s/o’s, and surprisingly, they have similar stories to me, but they say they have never even touched a saxophone, but they do like touching kids, which I’m all down for, just me and my buddies showing the new youth their abilities.

Update: i figured out what they meant by s/o is not the same as my s/o :(

Crying babies are like parties. No matter how many times you try to end it, it keeps going.

Sans: "Like, I'm so *flabbergasted*."

Gaster: "👌☼⚐ ✌☼☜ ✡⚐🕆 💧☜☼✋⚐🕆💧 ☼✋☝☟❄ ☠⚐🕈✍"

You're so ugly that when The Oh Hellos saw you, they were like "Oh Bye!"

How are women like swimming pools?

They cost a great deal of money to maintain considering the time you spend inside.

Your hairline be going up and down like a Formula 1 car!

- Sometimes I feel like killing myself...

- But?

- ...

Toast is like parents.

If they are both black, you have nothing to eat.

What's the similarity between Christmas stuffing and my penis?

I like them both inside dead animals, because alive animals feel too much like men, and then I'd cum too quick.

I ate a baby, it tasted like baby.

My phone is just like the Twin Towers; they got put in airplane mode.

Roses are red... Violets are blue... I feel like I'm gonna get raped next to you.

Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?

Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.

Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.

How is sex like air? It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.

I rate the atmosphere of Israel a 10/7; real good stuff there, looks like an actual movie!

LEGO Ninjago - I like it, okay?

Which of the ninja would be best for an undercover mission as the person in disguise?

Kai. He just has to leave his hair down and no one would know it was him. He uses hair gel, as Cole has said a couple times I think, because his hair looks like fire 🔥!

Why do women always have sex with the lights off?

Because they never like to see a man having a good time.

I like your cut, G.

*Slaps really hard*

BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

I raped a girl and I liked it.

I hope my girlfriend won't mind it.

It felt so wrong, it felt so right.

Don't mean I'm in love tonight.