Letter jokes
The "f" in orphan is for family.
Why is dark spelt with a K and not a C?
Because they can’t see their parents.
The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet. The student recited the alphabet: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz". "Where's the p?" He looked down to the floor and said: "it's running down my legs".
When I hired a Asian detective to see if my wife was cheating on me, I got this letter:
Mr. Wong - I see he, so I climb up tree. He knock on door and she let him in. She talks to him, he talks to she. He undresses she, she undresses he. She plays with he, he plays with she. I play with me, I fall out tree, I no see... No fee.
I know you don't like me, and that implies you need better taste.
I'm not an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.
I'd give you a nasty look, but it seems like you've already got one.
Your birth certificate should be rewritten as a letter of apology.
You haven't changed since the last time I saw you. You really should.
I laughed when I realized that my suicide letter is way longer than my sibling's college essay.
I've sadly received a rejection letter from NASA. Strangely, it says there's no space on their training program.
What does the 'w' in Africa stand for? Water.
"F" stand for family, that's why "orphan" is spelled with "ph."
What do you call a fish with no eye?
Fsh.
Read this slow: I 1 2 4 Q?
You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are K, F, and C.
How do you spell ihop?
Then spell ihop and say "ness".
What 7 letters do you say when you open the fridge and see it’s empty?
O I C U R M T
Dear Slim Shady,
balls.
Spell 'Imap' and say 'ness' at the end.
What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?
Others: R.
Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.
Why is the B so cool? Because it’s in between A and C.
Why is the Z the only politically correct letter?
Because all the other letters are not Z's.
Your mama is so ugly that her birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom company.