Length jokes
What is 14 inches long and starts with D?
A Dookie From GREEN DAY
Me.
The joke is as short as me.
How long are you? I
How long is it?
They told me Avengers: Endgame was going to be 3 hours long, but honestly? I felt like it was over in a SNAP!
What's 12 inches long and begins with a p?
A shit.
Did you hear about the 100 centimeter girl?
I’d really like to meter.
Why is he called Ben 10? Because he is ten in long.
What's the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they're both too short.
My dick is like the way home for an orphan, its length is never-ending.
Why is my pee pee 2 inches in length but 5 in girth?
What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
Three men are outside Heaven's gates waiting to go through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them, "Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven."
The first guy says, "I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times." The angel gives him an old model pick up. The second guy says, "11 years and only once," and is granted a Mercedes.
The last man says, "20 years and not once. I loved her with all my heart," and with the angel impressed, he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later, the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says, "I know we are dead, but it could be much worse."
The guy looks up and says, "How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard!"
What's longer than a penis?
About anything.
You wanna hear a joke about my penis?
Don’t worry, it’s too long.
People say that life is short.
I say... life is the longest thing we ever do.
What’s red, nine inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry every time she sees it?
Her abortion.
Why are Trump's ties so long?
Because they go all the way to Russia.