Know jokes
Do you know what my favorite time of day is?
6:30, hands down.
My dog got mad at me for touching his toy. Do you know what he said?
"Get your paws off!" š©š©š©
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
What kind of fish knows math?
An anglerfish LOL
I was walking down the street one day, and I passed the gun store. I walked in, and everything was half off. I didn't know back-to-school sales had started already!
Memes
Why do orphans suck at web design?
They donāt know what a home page is.
Q: Do you know why God created yeast infections?
A: So women will know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt, too.
My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house.
So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard. One said, "What tree?"
I replied, "Youāll know when you get here!"
My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldnāt fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"
How do you know someone from India is a good sniper?
They have a dot in the middle of the head.
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.
You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?
When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...
...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)
An Eskimo was holidaying in New Zealand and while driving his rented car around the countryside it broke down. A bloke passing by offered to help, lifted the bonnet and said, "I know your problem, you blew a seal."
The Eskimo with a shocked expression retorted, "Yeah? Well you fuck sheep!"
I went to visit my friend who is a stand up comedian and I asked him, "Why do you have so much art supplies, clothing fabrics, and building supplies in your basement?"
He responded with, "I don't know what it is people think I need it all for, but almost every time I perform, people tell me I need new material!"
Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.
How did I know where you would go next?
Oh, I felt it in my bones!
Sans: Why couldn't the skeleton go to prom?
Papyrus: Why? AND YOU KNOW I HATE PUNS!
Sans: Because they had NO BODY to go with.
Papyrus: THAT IS ENOUGH!!!
Sans: Sorry, didn't mean to GET UNDER YOUR SKIN.
Papyrus: YOU HAVE MADE ME MAD TO THE BONE SANS......wait
Sans: ( Ķ”Ā° ĶŹ Ķ”Ā°)
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know weāre not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they donāt know what a home looks like.
Dumb person: Wat idk mean?
Person 1: I donāt know.
Dumb one: Oh u donāt know okie I ask Googol.
Person 1: Wait idk means--
Dumb one (to Googol): WAT DOS IDK MANNN?
Googol: I donāt know.
Dumb one: OH ME GOOOD EVEN GOGLO DOESYN KNOWWW