What does a pregnant teen and an aborted child have in common?
They both say, “My mom's gonna kill me!”
Someone asked me if I've ever tried to kill myself. I responded, "Absolutely. A few times actually. I'm just not very good at it."
I have WWII in my blood since my great grandfather killed hitler.
they killed a whole family of crows.. it was a murder!... they killed a bunch of ravens..what a conspiracy!!
Someone kills a emotionally weak person by hard words and bullying. No one will suspect the killer was, anyone who took part.
3 europeans come to America. They all get captured by native americans and they want to kill them. But the europeans beg to have their lives spared. The native americans agreed to not kill them on one condition: the europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit and they will be informed what to do with it. So the first guy comes back with a peach. The native american says "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass and he laughs, and the native americans kill him. The second guy comes back with a grape. The native american tells him the same thing. He laughs and the native american kills him. They both see eachother in heaven and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach and peaches are fuzzy so thats why I laughed, but you had a grape, what happened?" The second guy says, “Oh yea I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!”
Me and my little brother were playing Call Of Duty. He wasn't doing very good so I told him so. My brother said to me, "at least I don't have to camp in order to get kills". I then responded with, "I would call you cancer, but at least cancer kills".
What's a popular name in China? Curiosity, because curiosity killed the cat.
why would a dead guy lie?
because he can't stand up
When your mean to the quiet kid in your class and he kills everyone good times
My grandad killed Hitler. He was such a great man
What’s a 14 year old and the fetus inside her both think. Man my moms going to kill me!
Two guys were walking down the street and one of the guys told his friend he could talk any Blond in the world into giving him a Blowjob, any Blond! So the guy bet him 20 bucks and pointed to this cute blond sitting on the side of the road and said alright let's see it! The other guy walks up to the cutie and says, Hi my names Dave and my Doctor just told me that if I didn't get a Blowjob from a Blond within three hours that the disease I have will kill me in 'oh less see now 22 minutes! She looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said "You mean I could save you from dying right now?" Then she says pull it out! 10 minutes later the two men were laughing and patting old Dave on the back when his friend noticed the blond sitting in the alley bawling her eyes out! So he walks over to her and says I would have thought you would be so happy for saving my friends life?! So she looks up him just crying her eyes out even worse and says" I could have saved my dad!"
why did 7 kill eleven. Because now 7 was even.
My boy I think it is about time that I leave this world. Now draw your weapon and kill me now! *draws a picture of his "epic" sword* "what......WHAT..... WTH ARE YOU DOING SIMPLETON? I DIDN'T MEAN THAT KIND OF DRAW!"
If I had a dime for every time someone has told me to KILL MYSELF I'd be a millionaire.
Im in the alagba association call 666-666-666 to join the gan its free and free kills duidui
There is a man in the hospital the power went out and the man was stabbed to death, there are three witnesses, the nurse who was with another patient, the doctor who was reading some paperwork, and The Who was at the vending machine, who killed the man? The mom did because you can’t use a vending machine when the powers out!
IF U HAD A FRIEND LIKE ME WOULD U KILL ME
I don't have much motivation for things that's why i haven't yet killed myself hehe
