Kids jokes

I got detention for giving an emo kid a glow stick... I tried to lighten his spirit.

Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!

Officer: You OK, kid?

Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.

Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*

When officer leaves:

Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?

I walked into an orphanage and a kid was crying. I asked him what was wrong and he said some kids were bullying him. I told him to go tell his parents.

How do you get a depressed kid out of a tree? You cut the rope.

What do you call a sped kid in a wheelchair that caught on fire?

Hot Wheels.

Why can't orphans really play baseball?

Because when they do, all the other kids tell that joke that everyone has heard more than 50 times.

Are you a school? 'Cause I wanna shoot kids in you.

I asked a emo kid if they wanna hang out.

The wheelchair kid laughed at my test score, so I told him to stand up to the anthem.

I got sent to the principal's office after telling the kid in the wheelchair to do a wheelie.

Kids in the backseat make accidents, but accidents in the backseat make kids.

What do Special Ed kids and fast kids have in common? They like to do things sped up.

My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.

The emo kid said, "I wanna die." But the quiet kid said, "Nah, I'm gonna die myself, bye!"

Best not leave hungry kids unattended!

There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.

She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."

Son said, "But I can't see."

Mom said, "That's the point."

What sexual position produces the ugliest kids? Ask your mum!

I threw a lamp at a depressed kid. I was just trying to brighten up his day.

I saw a kid crying in the corner. I asked them where their parents are. Man, I love working at an orphanage!

What in the world jumps the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.