Kids jokes

So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”

What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.

KFC proudly presents the kid fryer meal where our fillets are made out of kids. 😎 1 like = more kids in our fryer.

How to punish a blind kid, rearrange his bedroom.

People call me a bad person, but just the other day I saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents. I love working at the orphanage.

Chinese kid was born before the due date. Parents name him "Sudden Lee."

Son: Dad, am I adopted?

Father: What? No! Out of all the kids in the adoption center, do you really think I would pick you?

My friend and I were walking down the street, and we saw this one disabled kid getting bullied by three other kids. Urgently, we sprinted over to help. He had no chance against the five of us.

What happens when an emo kid loses a Kahoot? He gets a 25 kill streak.

Roses are red, violets are blue, there are kids in my basement, you'll be there soon.

Quiet kid: "I'm home!"

Parents: "What did you learn at school today?"

Quiet kid: "I've learned that I've had enough!"

What do you call a group of depressed kids?

Suicide Squad!

A depressed kid takes a drink of water and someone takes it and takes a drink. "Oh come on, the train stopped, the rope broke, I couldn't get on the building, the gun was empty, the knife was dull, the bridge was too low, and the cliff was nonexistent, and now you took the poison!"

The depressed kid getting bullied.

The bully: "You are useless."

The depressed kid: "I know."

What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?

The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.

What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?

Dribble.

I told a kid his dad is a magician because he disappeared and never came back home.

What do depressed kids and sloths have in common? They both hang from trees.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?

One is made of plastic and bad for kids; the other one holds shopping.

The depressed kid went to give a tree a high five...

...but it left him hanging.