Why did the kidnapper cross the road?
To get the kids at the playground.
Kids Jokes
For some reason a group of emo kids are following me because I gave them a Happy Meal.
What did John Cena say to the blind kid? "You can't see me."
Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.
But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.
I ran over some crippled kids. I told [them] to walk it off!
There's no Asian kids in my class, but it just happens to be the rice store and the pet store just ran out of stock...
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow kids thought they were mini school buses.
I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents at first."
What jumps higher than a basketball player?
An emo kid, they never touch the ground.
What is an Iraqi kid's favorite game?
Minesweeper.
I ran over three disabled kids.
"Cripple kill."
I asked a kid at my work where his parents were. He started crying. Man, I don't know what I did. I'll ask another kid at the orphanage.
When the school shooter says to get on the ground, but the sped kid thinks it's Simon Says!
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a Sandy Hook.
What do a priest and a pedo have in common?
Nothing, they both like kids.
If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.
So, I was raping this girl the other night, and she said, "Please just think of my kids!" I was like, "What a freak."
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?
Dribble.
Teacher: "Do you guys want to get in trouble?"
Kid named Teacher: *
What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?
Sum ting wong.
