Kids jokes
So this is how I got divorced.
On my birthday my boss, who was a hot sexy woman who I have always had an eye on her huge ass and tits, wished me happy birthday and took me to her house. She went into the shower and came out dressed and this made me disappointed. But then she stripped off and made my dick go into her pussy and before I could realize I heard her main door creak. And in came my wife, mum, and my 2 kids, 8 years old and 12 years old. Although my wife joined in, she was mad after since that was not my wife, that was my wife's twin sister. Do not know why woman these days are like this!!!!!!!!!!
So, a woman gives birth to a child, and the doctor grabs it by the leg and holds it upside down. Then, he starts swinging it around the room, slamming it into the furniture. The mother tries to get up and starts screaming and crying, “Let my baby go, you sick bastard!” The doctor looks at the mother and stops swinging the baby. He is holding it by the left leg and starts chuckling, “I’m just kidding, it was already dead.”
Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
A. Because he got hit by a truck.
What do you call a kid with a special sense of humor? Autism, hahaha!
How do you surprise a blind kid?
Put a plunger in the toilet.
Why is the gay kid gay?
Because he likes men.
One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.
Today I was at PE, and I saw a kid in a wheelchair. I threw a basketball at him, and I yelled, "Rocket League!"
Girl: I’m so in love with you!
Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.
Girl: What’s the ijk?
Boy: I’m just kidding.
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
What happened when a kid bullied an orphan?
The orphan said, "I’m going to tell my mom!"
Bully: "I wanna see your mom!"
Narrator: At that moment, he knew he messed up.
This was my friend's joke he wanted me to post;)
I asked a kid why he was so blue.
Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.
Q: What's yellow and floats?
A: A bus full of children.
What's the autistic kid's favorite song? Yours.
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
Why did the kidnapper cross the road?
To get the kids at the playground.
For some reason a group of emo kids are following me because I gave them a Happy Meal.
What did John Cena say to the blind kid? "You can't see me."
Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.
But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.
I ran over some crippled kids. I told [them] to walk it off!