What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
A middle schooler and his dad were at a drugstore. The boy picked up a pack of 3 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for high schoolers: 1 for Friday, 1 for Saturday, and 1 for Sunday." The boy then picked up a 6 pack of condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for college students: 2 for Friday, 2 for Saturday, and 2 for Sunday." The kid then picked up a pack of 12 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for married men: 1 for January, 1 for February..."
Tumblr people: "There are an infinite amount of genders."
The cannibal kid: "Bitch, please. There's just one gender: Food."
It's April Fools' Day. I'm gonna go to the orphanage and tell kids, "Their parents are here to pick them up."
What's the difference between drugs and kids?
I don't sell drugs.
I hope ya'll that have depression kys; you are worthless trash.
Just kidding.
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
What is yellow and brings kids to school every day?