Jump

Jump Jokes

There's a plane going down over the desert with only 3 parachutes on board. There are four people onboard, the smartest man in the world, the best doctor in the world, an old priest, and a young nerd. The doctor says, "People need me for my medical skills." grabs the first parachute pack, and jumps. The smartest man in the world says, "People need me for my intelligence." grabs a pack, and jumps. The old priest says, "I have lived a long and happy life. You take the last chute." The nerd says, "Don't worry. There are enough chutes for the both of us. The smartest man in the world just grabbed my backpack."

When an emo kid jumps out of a tree what happens when he hits the ground?

Nothin much he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope

How is having fun with a prostitute like bungee jumping?

You’re dead if the rubber breaks.

My depressed friend said he wanted to jump off of a bridge but he didn’t wanna commit suicide. I told him if yhu jump and yell parkour, it’ll just be a failed stunt

“I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry”

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Joe Biden’s speeches are so motivational. In fact, I have been stuck at home these past few weeks, and his well articulated words were enough for me to muster up the courage to jump off of a 10 story building.

Why does Mexico not have a good athletics team? Because anyone who can run or jump is already over the wall.

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