Jump jokes
Your mom is so weak, when she jumped from the Twin Towers, her baby became disabled.
Ever heard the saying white people can’t jump??
Well, I think that’s total bullshit. You should have seen us on 9/11!
5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said... "Wait, why are there mines all over the floor?"
Your mama is so fat that when she jumped, they found water on Mars.
Emos love jumping for joy.
What do us emos all have in common?
Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."
Which city holds the record for the most suicides committed from a gorilla jumping off a tall building?
It was called Fall-adelphia.
"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.
So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"
I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"
What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off a bridge? "(sign language)"
A guy jumped out of the Twin Towers, saying, "I ordered pepperoni pizza, not a plane!"
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
I took my friend skydiving once, and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute. Then I remembered he was emo.
What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?
One does it for the cash, the other for the views.
Why is bungee jumping similar to a condom?
Because if the rubber snaps, you're fucked.
Yo mama is so ugly that not even the Socs wanted to jump her.
You're so fat, when you jumped, the whole planet wiggled.
Yo mama so fat...
That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!
Mother: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you follow?
Me: Leads a marching parade off the Golden Gate Bridge.
My wife is so fat. She jumped up in the air and got stuck.