Jump jokes

Ever heard the saying white people can’t jump??

Well, I think that’s total bullshit. You should have seen us on 9/11!

5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said... "Wait, why are there mines all over the floor?"

What do us emos all have in common?

Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."

Emos love jumping for joy.

I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"

"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.

So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"

Which city holds the record for the most suicides committed from a gorilla jumping off a tall building?

It was called Fall-adelphia.

So I got my brother a jumping castle for his birthday. That bitch cried in his wheelchair.

What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off a bridge? "(sign language)"

What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?

One does it for the cash, the other for the views.

Why is bungee jumping similar to a condom?

Because if the rubber snaps, you're fucked.

A guy jumped out of the Twin Towers, saying, "I ordered pepperoni pizza, not a plane!"

Yo mama is so ugly that not even the Socs wanted to jump her.

You're so fat, when you jumped, the whole planet wiggled.

You are so fat that when you jump into the pool, everyone gets out.

I took my friend skydiving once, and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute. Then I remembered he was emo.

Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?

Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.

Yo mama so fat, when she jumps, NASA says a meteor hits Earth.

Why do emos love jumping in water?

Because it involves a rope.

Yo mama so fat...

That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!