Joke jokes
People who make puns always get pun-ched by people.
What's a goat's favorite video game?
Mario Goat Cart!
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
How did the Skeleton know it was gonna rain?
He read the weather forecast.
What's a queen's favorite drink? Royal-tea!
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A pork chop.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"
I was submitting this joke, and I realized Stephen Hawking couldn't.
It had the reCAPTCHA "I'm not a robot."
What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?
A condescending con descending.
I'm bone dry in material, but I have a skeleTON of skeleton jokes. After I tell you all these rib ticklers, you will have a bone to pick with if you didn't find that funny, you outta rip my spine out.
You: What you doing?
I wonder what you’re doing because you’re bad at math, hahahahaha!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
What is the thirstiest ocean in the world?
The Gulf of Mexico lol!
How do you know someone is fucking dumb?
They put jokes that have been used several times already.
Q: What's the difference between a folk singer and a 14" pizza?
A: The pizza can support a family of four.
How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
You Poker Face.
Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.
Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.
Years later:
Dad still did not come back.
Knock knock.
- Who's there?
- The doorbell repairer.
What do you call a group of letters that like to dance but make you want to poop?
A vowel movement.