What do you call a snail without a shell?
Dead.
Joke Jokes
What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef stroganoff.
dont make jokes about the accident my dad died in it he was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia :(
What do orphans call a family pic?
A selfie.
What does a cigarette and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
What do you call a vagina with teeth?
A vicious cunt.
What did the priest say to the skunk?
Let us spray.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Queen.
Queen who?
You don't know the queen? You're crazy!
What did the Chinese girl say when she had a white baby?
"Sum Ting Wong."
Q: What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub?
A: Throw in some laundry.
What do you call a Sikh man standing on a rope? Balan Singh.
What do a priest and a McDonalds have in common?
They both slide their meat in 10 year old buns.
Why is it ok to smack an orphan?
What are they going to do? Tell their parents!
What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini.
Friend: Wanna hear a joke?
Other Friend: Sure.
Friend: Pussy.
Other Friend: I don't get it.
Friend: And you never will.
How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up like an altar boy.
Where did Sally go when the bomb went off?
Everywhere.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
Your birth certificate is a complaint to the condom factory.
Me: I know why you don't have friends.
Kid: Why?
Me: Because you can't even figure that out.
Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?
You have to look down to see him.
