Joke jokes
Me after Taco Bell, "I’m about to blow this place up like September 11."
What did the priest say to the skunk?
Let us spray.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter what you call it; it won’t come to you.
What weighs 70 pounds and doesn't like sex?
The 6-year-old in the trunk of my car.
Guys, we gotta stop telling these jokes. They are getting out of h- oh wait no .... Continue.
Yo daddy so stupid, he threw a Father’s Day party at the orphanage.
What did the Catholic priest say to the other Catholic priest as they entered the orphanage? Let’s us prey.
I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.
I was the second worst thing to happen to those orphans.
What do you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.
When I saw your hairline, I thought you worked at McDonald’s.
My name is Ethan, and I don't find this funny.
Why did he go to the chiropractors?
To get his spine fixed.
What did the emo kid say to the other?
"I like ya cut, G."
What do you call a cat with a live in doctor?
An anemic, shrivelled cat with desperate attached owners.
I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.
So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.
Why’d the chicken cross the road?
To get choked and stroked by Mr. Big Bloke!
“We’ll choke and stroke, it ain’t no joke!”
People on the Titanic were cracking up at my jokes, so did the Titanic. No, really, the Titanic cracked in half!
What do Indians call their father when they are born?
Data.
Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen? Just how low can you get?
I saw an orphan take a selfie... oh man, that was one alone family photo.
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"
The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"
Johnny replies: "Sure."
After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.
Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"
The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."
After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.